No thanks, I'm fine

I went in for my oral surgery today, paid my portion, got all ready for the procedure, and had the surgeon look at my little bump.  Or wait... what USED to be my bump.  It's almost entirely gone!  So he decided not to remove it!  WOO HOO!!  He was surprised that it's nearly unnoticeable and said in his years of surgery, they always come back and never go away on their own.  Except mine appears to magically be fixing itself.  Hollllller!

Who knows, it'll likely grow back in, and at that time I need to call to get surgery re-booked.  But for today, no need to restrict myself to just soft, bland foods!  Woo!!

Retail therapy

Just a quick check in to share that I'm feeling much better, thank you.  The guy situation still feels sucky but I'm not crying about it anymore and am not feeling so lonely (packing my schedule with things with friends helps!).  I'll get back out there soon enough.  ;)  The upcoming oral surgery (day after tomorrow) should be smooth and easy enough.  In the grand scheme, I've dealt with much scarier things.  I'm not that worried about it.  And the work stress is still there but I'm trying to get a handle on it.  It'll be fine.  I'll be fine.  I really am feeling a lot better than I was a week ago.

Life?!  It's crazy.  But I'll be fine!

All the shopping I've been doing (a new Shark vacuum and Shark steam mop, casual Sorels with an employee store discounted price, Nordstrom personal shopping, Stella & Dot earrings to replace my favorite lost pair, new art for my bedroom, my first CAbi party and purchase, etc.) has been helping.  I'm cleaning house and updating my life (and wardrobe!).  :)

Who needs saliva, anyway

I had my consultation with the oral surgeon yesterday, and it's (sorta) good news.  One, he's certain the bump under my tongue is benign.  Two, it's a normal thing where my salivary duct/gland got clogged (either from trauma like poking the area with food or something, or dehydration and then subsequent overactivity) and has turned into a bump.  The downside?  I have to have it removed, or else it will continue to grow and could become a bigger problem.  So I have oral surgery scheduled for a couple weeks from now, and it should be easy enough, with just a couple stitches and soft/bland food and ibuprofen for a couple of days.  It'll be sent off for biopsy, just in case.  So the good news is that it's something easy enough and (hopefully!) benign.  No stinking oral cancer for me!  The bad news is that I still have to have the floor of my mouth under my tongue sliced up.

I'm still feeling in the midst of a mental breakdown, but I went to happy hour (or HH as the kids call it) today to celebrate a friend's promotion and it was really good.  Felt almost normal and not totally sad!  So it was a good step.  When I get into a slump, there's always a day where I wake up and feel like I've snapped out of it.  So I know it'll get better, and that it's coming.  I just don't know when.  I'm tired of crying and being sad and stressed.  But I'll be okay in the end.  I always am...  I mean, if I can handle surgery to remove (part of) a brain tumor, I can handle anything, right?!

My hiatus

I've been a bad blogger, and I sometimes feel a little guilty about it.  Truth is, when I'm not blogging, it means I'm living my life.  My tumor is not on my mind (well, it always is a TINY bit, but you know what I mean).  I'm feeling normal, and healthy.  I'm busy.  I don't have health-related things to write about (except I did get my new tooth a month ago! no more pirate!).  These are all wonderful things!

But I'm having an awful week, and will use this as a place to vent, be therapeutic.  I had been quite happy for the last few months (and longer!), since last blogging.  But within just the last week, I've hit a real rough patch. I got told at work that I'm project managing a huge 4-month long (give or take) project for my department, and it feels like pretty much the worst thing I could have been told (it's traditionally a very painful project).  The guy I'd been dating (quite happily and wonderfully) broke things off completely out of the blue, and for not a very good reason, IMO; I'm crushed, totally crushed.  And a small bump under my tongue that my dentist noticed a couple of months ago has gotten me referred to an oral surgeon tomorrow, after being told by my periodontist last week, "You don't have the markers for oral cancer, but that bump should be removed and sent off for a biopsy ASAP.  It's beyond my area of expertise.  Can you get an appointment with them ASAP?"

So I have my consultation tomorrow with an oral surgeon, and I'm sure it'll be fine.  I mean, odds are, it is fine.  It's just a bit nerve-wracking, as it's not like I haven't had remote and unlikely health things hit me before.  I still remember my original neurologist getting my first MRI results back and saying, "There's something on here, but we don't think it's a tumor."  Famous last words!  Really though, I'm not especially nervous for tomorrow's appointment, as I think it's just some stubborn tissue that grew into the space when my tooth was missing, and now it's overstaying its welcome.  Will keep you posted though...  Wish me luck!

(And apologies for the pity party.  I'm just really having a rough time right now, and feeling the saddest I have in a couple of years.  :*(  I'll turn it around soon...)